Usually it is spinning with thoughts and emotions.
Today it is completely lucid.
My mind has caught on to what my heart has known for some time.
I can't really pinpoint when it happened...
It just did.
I got tired, bored and your careless ways irritated me.
I got sick of sitting there for nothing.
And you expected me to be ecstatic when I did see you.
But why should I be?
To be euphoric over an hour a week (at the most) is the height of idiocy.
But I was...
For a time.
Now I'm sick of it.
You don't have the courage to tell me to my face.
And that's fine.
If I were to see you again,
I would weaken and beg you to stay.
So stay away.
Leave me alone.
Give me time to come to grips with this.
A century or two should suffice.
I don't need you.
I did love you...
But that's dead.
I'll get over it.
And I hope you do too...
That's a lie.
I hope you're suffering
The way I was at first.
A wry smile twists my face at the thought.
I know that if anyone suffers,
It will be me.