Love Letter

Look, over the course of these past seven months, I have realized that you are alot of things. Some are good, some are not so good. But I never would have realized that you were a coward. I can't believe you are so scared of a confrontation that you would do something as cold as drop me flat without any explanation of any kind. I know that I don't fit into your idea of "the perfect" girl, but what is hardest for me to understand is how someone whom I thought was so wonderful could be so superficial. I told you and told you not to expect perfection because you would only be disappointed. And I was right. I am well aware that the Internet thing that really never was is over. But you could have told me and not kept me dangling over it. You yourself know how insecure I can be but you still did this anyway. Well do you know what? You can go to hell. I don't need you. I honestly cared about you, but I'll get over it. As a matter of fact, I think I already am. Anyone who can make me feel this horrible doesn't deserve any feelings other than contempt. Have a nice life...actually, I hope you have a horrible life because you deserve it for what you have put me through. I feel it is my duty to inform the next girl you are in "love" with that you might not mean it. Certainly that was the case here. How could you be so horrible as to say something like that and not mean it? I mean, those three little words have shaped humanity and to just toss them around like nothing cheapens them and makes them seem almost dirty. I am not really that mad at you...well, actually I am, but I am more angry at myself for being so stupid as to believe you. How naive and confidently unpresuming can I be? I am so mortified that I actually believed all those pipe dreams you spoke of without questioning them. I guess I should probably have trusted my instincts more. When I told you it was over that first time way back in December, I think my subconcious knew what was going to happen. And that second time I was actually more afraid of losing than I was of losing you. Not that it matters now. I was already having doubts about this but my ego wouldn't let me get away with one weak little email so I convinced myself that I had to getyou back because I couldn't bear the thought of leaving without first making you miserable. I hope you are. I really do. God, to think that the only way you will see this is if you hack into my account,which I wouldn't put past you. You've done it before, what's to stop you from doing it again. You must have been having one great laugh these seven months. I mean, you have played the ultimate practical joke here. Convincing someone that you are crazy about them and getting them to be crazy about you is an admirable bit of acting...but then, I'm no slouch myself. It is so weird to know that I actually had you believing I was crazy. That whole "I'm checking myself into a mental hospital" bit was a classic. The other stuff was pretty good too, but I guess what goes around comes around huh. Oh well.

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